P is for *Protest. A-Z Challenge.

I started going white, just in the front, when I was 21. I dyed my hair at first even though I really liked my white streak. Why? Peer pressure mostly. I didn’t want to look “old” because old was something that was frowned upon. Grey hair on a younger person meant I had given up on myself somehow. Dying the grey out meant I was “fighting” growing old.

This idea is HILARIOUS to me! Like dying my hair somehow hid me from the Grim Reaper. Like dying my hair showed I was doing my best to stay alive or something. Like dying my hair made me immortal.

I eventually decided to stop and embrace my grey and now I’m grey on purpose.

Seriously. I’m not grey enough to have a full head of it yet, so I put in light streaks and my hairdresser and I have been toning the shit out of my hair to get it match the natural tinsel that’s growing in.

It’s glorious and very freeing. I LOVE my hair, the greyer and whiter it gets, the better. My work kids tease me and say “You look like a Grandma!” which makes me laugh as I say ” I AM a Grandma! And Grandmas are the BEST kind of people!” We gotta teach these little ones young.

It wasn’t easy to get to this age positive, grey positive place. There was pushback from friends, hairdressers, society of course. My husband even, in not so many words of course. I wield a mean frying pan plus.. divorce.

But I was angry and I was defiant so I pushed through that NONSESNE fueled by one little experience that shaped a whole portion of my life.

My father in law, in one of the few times he ever made me angry, said this of an elderly neighbour lady:

” Have you seen Wilma’s hair?! It’s so long and scraggly. Grey too. She needs to cut and dye it. She looks like an old sea hag!”

A nasty comment, right? Usually I was able to let his misogynistic B.S. float in one ear and out the other, but there was something about this time, or maybe it was something about me at that time , that didn’t allow that happen.

That comment circulated in my brain as I watched this lady out in her garden enoying life and hurting nobody. How DARE he judge her like that? What gave HIM the right to decide what she did with her f8cking hair? Hadnt she earned the right at her age to do whatever the f8ck she wanted?! And why was it ok for him to be OLD and have GREY hair but not her? Dad wasn’t that much younger than Wilma, did he forget that fact or was this a judgement only reserved for women?

Oooooh, I was mad!

I turned to him, eyes blazing I’m sure and said ” I think it’s beautiful! It’s HER hair and she wasn’t placed on earth to please you. ”

Silence. Dad was known for being an asshole when challenged and not many were brave enough to do it.

He raised an eyebrow and I forged on, my mind made up in an instant ” I HOPE I look like her when I’m that age. You may call ME a Sea WITCH!”

And that was that.

I would have my grey hair. I would wear it proudly in PROTEST of all our stupid cultural beliefs and expectations. And f8ck anyone who tries to tell me differently.

I told you I was mad.

I’ve been a greyling ever since.

Protest hair. It’s a thing!

21 thoughts on “P is for *Protest. A-Z Challenge.

  1. Wow, protest hair sounds awesome! 😀 Love the way you own your decision and don’t give tuppence about random opinions. Strange how we are expected to behave a certain way because “that’s how it is done”.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. YAY! It’s been freeing for me to go grey … no more hair jobs, often done by me with disastrous results and having to shoot up to the salon for a repair job, time consuming, costs involved etc – actually that reminds me – with all the savings I’ve incurred, maybe time for me to go buy a ridiculously expensive face cream to soften the wrinkles – just kidding!

    I also had streaks while my hair was in process of growing out …

    Nice to see that photo!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow! I am totally in awe of you.. I just cannot get myself to let my hair be itself.. Actually more and more ladies in my city of Pune (In India) choose to stop or not dye their hair. And it looks good too. I dont know when I will reach that stage though! Thoroughly enjoyed your post. Good luck with the AtoZ!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Haha.. loved your post today. I may have to experience the same soon. Few years back i had a hair loss problem and I used to pour out my worries to my friend saying at this rate i will go bald and she was just smiling and calm and poised and said so what? wear a wig.. simple!! It is all in our minds and they way we respond to people around us. IGNORE, REVOLT, BECOME STRONG or KEEP WORRYING – need to choose the best one for self.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I’m with you! I stopped dying my hair yearsssss ago and am about as gray as you are. I’m glad I did it. I had a white streak for years but got to thinking of all those chemicals burning my scalp and decided enough was enough. I’m sure you’ve heard/seen young women these days purposely dying their hair gray! What a change… Thanks for commenting on my blog! http://www.lisabuiecollard.com

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m glad you spoke up to your father in-law. The older I get the more I see how fragile male egos can be. Often they go on the offensive to hide the little mouse hiding inside of them. I love your Gloria Steinem quote. I pray I live to see the day and can be part of that celebration ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    • I think it’s building as we speak. This new generation of women, the teens and 20 year olds are so brave and intelligent. I have hope for all of us.
      I love the visual of the little mouse. That is exactly it.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I went grey last year after an extended period of time when I was unable to go to a hairdresser or even wash my own hair. I hadn’t intended it, but I found that living with grey hair and loving it was remarkably easy. Since then I see more and more women choosing to stop colouring their hair. We are a growing army!

    Liked by 2 people

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